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What is never going to stop being funny?
submitted by BabiesGotTheBends to AskReddit
An ugly man walks into a bar and a beautiful woman approaches him...
... the woman asks the man, "How would you like to get out of here?" and the man is stunned. He never thought a woman like her would ever approach him so he agrees. They both get into his car
My girlfriend is away. She didn't believe me that I could make a fancy dinner for myself.
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Avoid Humans - Site uses FourSquare and Instagram data to tell you which places near you have t(...)
Who wants head scratches?
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Great aerial Rocket League goal
submitted by GallowBoob to gaming
Washington State announces it will not allow professors to ban words they don’t like
submitted by gingechris to news
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iconTechmeme

CyanogenMod gets Android 5.1 and Stagefright security fixes (Jon Fingas/Engadget)
Jon Fingas / Engadget:CyanogenMod gets Android 5.1 and Stagefright security fixes  —  If youve been sitting on pins and needles waiting for the community-focused CyanogenMod firmware to both make the
Google, Microsoft, and Mozilla will drop RC4 encryption in Chrome, Edge, IE, and Firefox next y(...)
Emil Protalinski / VentureBeat:Google, Microsoft, and Mozilla will drop RC4 encryption in Chrome, Edge, IE, and Firefox next year  —  Google, Microsoft, and Mozilla all made the same announcement today:
Mozilla Relaunches Its Thimble Online Code Editor For Teaching HTML, CSS And JavaScript (Freder(...)
Frederic Lardinois / TechCrunch:Mozilla Relaunches Its Thimble Online Code Editor For Teaching HTML, CSS And JavaScript  —  Back in 2012, Mozilla launched Thimble, an online code editor for teaching the
US district judge in San Francisco grants California Uber drivers class action status in lawsui(...)
Colin Lecher / The Verge:US district judge in San Francisco grants California Uber drivers class action status in lawsuit against the company  —  Judge grants California Uber drivers class action
LotusFlare Gets $6 Million to Fund Quest to Bring Mobile Data to Emerging Markets (Ina Fried/Re(...)
Ina Fried / Re/code:LotusFlare Gets $6 Million to Fund Quest to Bring Mobile Data to Emerging Markets  —  Investor Chamath Palihapitiya figures that mobile data service will eventually make its
Branch founder Josh Miller becomes the White House's first Director of Product after leaving Fa(...)
Connie Loizos / TechCrunch:Branch founder Josh Miller becomes the White Houses first Director of Product after leaving Facebook  —  Josh Miller Leaves Facebook For The White House  —  Once an
Sales automation startup Apptus raises $108M Series C at a valuation of more than $1B (Natalie (...)
Natalie Gagliordi / ZDNet:Sales automation startup Apptus raises $108M Series C at a valuation of more than $1B  —  Sales automation startup Apptus raises $108 million  —  Apptus is backed
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Abduction call leads to kidnapping, sex assault charges for Rave
RAVENEL, S.C. (WCIV) -- A Ravenel man was charged with kidnapping and sex assault after a woman accused him of taking her and her 13-year-old daughter at knife point and sexually assaulting the girl and another 6-year-old child.
Are you faking it? 11 hilarious signs your work-life balance is off
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shift by msnbc – Original video from msnbc
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Wait, 'Top Chef' is more than Angelo vs. Kenny?
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When climate change attacks
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Police in Illinois hunt for 3 suspects after officer killed
AP Latest News;
Harper, The Un-reality Show Star,. As Canada Slides into Reccession
 Stephen Harper, campaigning for a fourth term as prime minister on a record of economic growth, has refused to recognise that Canada is in a recession, despite new data to the contrary.Collapsing prices for oil – a major export –
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Life histories of Mediterranean pines
In Plant Ecology, Vol. 171, No. 1-2. , pp. 53-68, doi:10.1023/b%3avege.0000029383.72609.f0 To insert individual citation into a bibliography in a word-processor, select your preferred citation style below and drag-and-drop it into the document.
R2-D2 car charger puts the droid in your cupholder
Cant get enough of Star Wars most lovable blue-clad droid? We recently detailed the new R2-D2 Bluetooth speaker, which is a realistic replica of R2-D2s head. Now theres a new companion to add to your R2-D2 fondness, and this one
Two VICE News Reporters Arrested, Charged with 'Terror Activity' in Turkey
Two VICE News reporters and their Iraqi translator have been arrested and charged with participating in terror activity in the southeastern party of Turkey. According to the AFP , British journalists Jake Hanrahan and Philip Pendlebury , along with their
"Is shale dead? Not by a long shot as efficiency improves"
Since oil prices began falling, most shale producers have responded by embracing hard times, working to make their operations more efficient, renegotiating contracts with service companies and, most significant, cutting production costs and spending on new wells.
Three more killed in Assam flood; over 7.3 lakh people hit
The current deluge has claimed 18 lives in the current wave of floods while the toll in this years two waves of flood rose to 23 in the state. The flood situation in Assam worsened on Monday with three more
BlackHousea s Sean Ludwick arrested, charged with DWI in fatal crash
BlackHouse Development co-founder Sean Ludwick was arrested and charged with DWI and leaving the scene of an accident for his alleged role in a fatal car wreck in Sag Harbor over the weekend. Citing police statements, multiple outlets reported that
Ted Cruz: Houston Murder is a Manifestation of Obama's Assault on Police
Ted Cruz told reporters in New Hampshire today that President Obama s rhetoric was to blame for the murder of Sheriff Deputy Darren Goforth this weekend. Cruz said at a town hall that Obama has created a climate that encourages
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Photoshop this pointing governor
The first rule of Daycare Fight Club is...wait, DAYCARE Fight Club?
WWE Hall of Famer Jimmy 'Superfly' Snuka charged with murder. Good thing he already knows what (...)
Multiple departments responded to today's most ironic headline
Out of nowhere, there's this high-pitched screech from high above, and suddenly a rabid beast f(...)
Coffee and bourbon: two great tastes that taste great together
BBQ scented lottery tickets are now a thing, because North Carolina
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iconMetafilter

At play in the waves
Playing Docs Games: Part I, Part II.
It's really hard to critique Disney, right?
Walidah Imarisha is a professor at Portland State University, where she teaches a class on race and Disney. This is her interview with Bitch Media on the racial politics of Disney animals.
RADIUM CONDOM
The good people at Morphy Auctions gave me permission to show you these vintage (~1930s-50s) condom package designs. -- Cardhouse on historical condom packaging and design.
like I'm the only person who ever mixed a margarita in a sailor's mouth!
How Many Men Did The Golden Girls Sleep With, Exactly? Refinery 29 claims to have tallied up the numbers. (A quick summary courtesy of Jezebel.) (and another summary from Buzzfeed if you like it with GIFs)BUT WAIT, THERES MORE! Dont
*(F)old*
Slack Texas Hold Em Poker Bot Makes me wish Metafilter had a Slack channel hint, hint ...
Worms, meatballs and logos
In the 70s, NASA commissioned a redesign of their meatball logo. They wanted something to make it more modern and better designed, so eventually the worm logo was unveiled. Unfortunately a lot of NASA engineers hated it.
Theories of Everything, Mapped
Explore the deepest mysteries at the frontier of fundamental physics , and the most promising ideas put forth to solve them. A map of the frontier of fundamental physics built by interactive developer Emily Fuhrman.
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